Obsessed: New Girl

Realizing I should’ve watched this show years ago.

Winston: “Because you didn’t set boundaries. As a friend, you can lift a heavy object, but you can’t drive her to the airport, okay?”


Blast from the Past

Sun, 06 May 2007 13:49:37

So sick of this game.
So sick of running around blinded,
pushed and shoved like the object that I’ve become.
You want to hurt me? Go ahead.
Rip apart those fresh scars
that lie on the surface of my skin.
Drill holes into my heart
which has been punctured long ago.

Maybe then there’ll be a realization
That I stand here already broken
from family, from circumstance, from pain
without your concern or care.

Maybe then there’ll be understanding
that this is the last of my strength
and I’m not fighting this battle anymore.

Happy Valentine’s Day… I guess

Sun, 11 Feb 2007 21:29:46

Remember the days back in elementary when you used to have those boxes taped to your desk? And you had to give a valentine to everyone in the class else you wouldn’t be allowed to give any at all. So that meant that you would always get one from your class crush… or for others, that you’d always get one period. And it was fun. Picking out which Disney/Winnie the Pooh/Bugs Bunny valentine set you wanted to purchase and writing the names of your classmates on those 3 unnecessary lines that they provided for you. And if you were really lucky, you’d get the ones that folded unto themselves so you wouldn’t need to lick 20-something envelopes.


not actually me, but you get the picture

Valentine’s day
I wish that everyone can see the glory of Your works.
The blessings You have bestowed upon all of us,
the undeserving and the disobedient;
to everyone.
I wish them the greatest happiness,
and the greatest love
that anyone could ever know.


Does it count if she’s more than a decade younger than you?


photo cred. @chloekimsnow


2017 in Review

2017 was my year of joy. Even though the whole world seemingly crashed down on me at times, it was a year marked by unfathomable love, endless laughter, and a peace I’d never known before. So I look back on 2017 with a bit of melancholy longing in hopes that 2018 brings a new season of joy. Who knows? Maybe the finalé of my 20s will be the shining gem I always hoped my sweet 16 and champagne 21 to be. Or maybe 2017 will be the past light to face the zombie apocalypse (literal and figurative) waiting for me in 2018. I sure hope not, but we’ll just have to just wait and see.

  1. Snowboarding blind in Vermont
  2. Concussions and broken limbs galore at Blue and Tremblant
  3. Taking the reins and ending things before they crashed and burned
  4. Fulfilling my snowboarding dreams whilst dislocating my elbow
  5. A Power Rangers birthday and the best friends a girl could ask for
  6. Being off work (first time ever!) and spending more time with God
  7. Confessions and learning to wait
  8. Spain and Portugal trip with the coolest cats
  9. Frolicking in Niagara doing ALL THE THINGS
  10. First-ever music festival… and probably the last
  11. Are we official yet?
  12. All the friends getting married
  13. Mom getting sick and living in hell for 3 weeks
  14. Meeting the parents and road tripping to Chicago
  15. Spontaneous start to the new snowboarding season in Tremblant
  16. Bringing an SO to meet the extended fam for the first time
  17. All the pow at blue mountain with my besties
  18. Ringing in the new year with friends, loved ones and board games


but really, he’s the best part of 2017 🙂

Blast from the Past

Fri, 04 May 2007 00:05:01

At a loss for words.
Too much has been going on in my life
and nothing at all.
Sometimes I wish for the drama;
of dreams and fairy tales come true.
Sometimes I wish the world would stop
so I could take a breath
and regain a composure lost long ago.
Sometimes, sometimes
I wish I could open up to the world
what I truly feel in the corridors of my heart.

But fantasies wane to the harshness of society.
Time waits for no one
and my heart stays closed

and guarded with all my strength.
Until then it seems.

Movie thoughts

Watching Thor: Ragnarok all like  “this is what it would’ve been like if Galadriel got the ring of power“.

Eomer turned evil.

Sauron even shows up at the end and destroys everything. 

Thor?…  Or LOTR alternate ending?

Jekyll and Hyde

What a weird day.

After what should have been a thoroughly fun day prancing through waterfalls in Hamilton, a day out with the bf and a good friend ended on a somber note. I won’t go into details, but basically it made me reflect on the person I’ve become today versus the person I was a mere 7 years ago. Much has changed and truth be told, Patricia of 2010 would not have recognized Patricia of 2017. In 7 years God has truly taken the ashes and desolation of a broken and emotionally unstable 21 year-old’s life and made it into something I still wake up each morning in disbelief that I’ve reached this point somehow.

I have a good job
good friends
a stellar boyfriend.

I have a roof over my head I enjoy coming home to. I have travel memories and travel plans for the future. I have finances that I can utilize to help those who aren’t as financially fortunate.

And it’s funny. I used to think that God had just dealt me the bad hand in life. That life would be this continuous roller coaster that had its ups and downs but never quite got any better than what I’ve already experienced. That to hope in the good things life had to offer would only leave me discouraged and disappointed. I settled for less, far more than I should have. Only because I didn’t trust that God loved me enough to give me more. The angry, pessimistic, depressed Patricia of the past more resembled Edward Hyde to 2017’s Jekyll.

It made me realize how great God is. That while some people spend their whole lives waiting for God to show them miracles, my whole life became a miracle. That from out of almost nothing, I now have more than I could have ever have hoped for.

So to my friend going through tough times, do not lose heart.
Never give up.
God will take you out of the ashes,
out of the storms.
I don’t know when, but He will.
I promise.